Phyllis Ada Diller, 1917 - 2012
At Brentwood, California home on 25 February 2007. Photo by Brian Hamilton
Phyllis Diller quotes:
Quotes found : 53 — (15 per page, this is page 3 of 4) Previous 1 2 3 4 Next
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- Most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going. permalink
Phyllis Diller - My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. permalink
Phyllis Diller - My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. permalink
Phyllis Diller - My photographs don't do me justice - they just look like me. permalink
Phyllis Diller - My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual. permalink
Phyllis Diller - Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. permalink
Phyllis Diller - Never refer to your wedding night as the original amateur hour. permalink
Phyllis Diller - Phyllis Diller's Marriage Manual (1969) - No matter what time your guests arrive, pretend they're early, so naturally you're not ready. permalink
Phyllis Diller - Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves. permalink
Phyllis Diller - The best contraceptive for old people is nudity. permalink
Phyllis Diller - The only parts left of my original body are my elbows. permalink
Phyllis Diller - The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing at you. permalink
Phyllis Diller - The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. permalink
Phyllis Diller - There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem? permalink
Phyllis Diller - There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto. permalink
Phyllis Diller
Quotes found : 53 — (15 per page, this is page 3 of 4) Previous 1 2 3 4 Next
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