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Quotes of the Day for 1 December 2004 - Woody Allen

Allan Stewart Konigsberg was born at Brooklyn, New York on this day in 1935. By age fifteen he was selling one-liners to New York gossip columnists. He dropped out of college and sold jokes to several prominent comics of the day, and started doing standup comedy himself in 1960. Five years later, under the name Woody Allen, he wrote and acted in "What's New, Pussycat?". I've never been wild about his films, but I do seem to have collected a number of his one-liners.

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying.

I took a course in speed reading and was able to read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It's about Russia.

I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies.

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.

When we lose twenty pounds ... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have! We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty.
     - All from Woody Allen


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